書摘 假性孤兒 - 憂鬱症

“It isn’t only in romantic relationships that people may feel deep emotional loneliness. I’ve worked with single people who have similar stories, but their unhappy adult relationships are played out with parents or friends. Typically, their relationships with their parents are so draining that they don’t have the emotional energy to pursue romantic relationships, nor do they want to. Their experiences with their parents have taught them that relationships mean feeling abandoned and burdened at the
same time. To these people, relationships feel like traps. They already have their hands full with a parent who acts like he or she owns them.”

這作者完全寫中我的心聲！就是因為原生家庭的媽媽求關注求 spotlight 讓我覺得太煩了，我根本沒有多餘的情緒能量去耗損，很畏懼去開一段新的關係，因為原生家庭像emotional vampire一樣吸取精力，讓我覺得沒事找事還要開新的任務支線我難道傻了嗎

於是一方面羨慕他人有穩定的關係，一方面又覺得任何固定關係都是囚禁自己、太過炙熱的燙手山芋，我消受不起。


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