感覺被嫌棄 - 抗癌
By Hardy
at 2015-01-31T00:24
at 2015-01-31T00:24
Table of Contents
從發現自己得到血癌到現在也一年半了,經過了化療.骨髓移植,身體和心理多少受到了點影響,但因為有家人.朋友和男朋友的陪伴,讓我覺得自己是不孤單的,也一路走到了現在,我和我男友交往五年多了,從大學時期到出社會感情一直很穩定,我確診時家人有跟他講過,如果他選擇離開沒有人會怪他,他只說了句我對他來說很重要,之後他每個月都會南下來看我,陪我住院讓我開心,好不容易等到我化療都結束了也可以出門時時還一起出去旅遊,但好景不常過半年後我復發了,這次他的家人沒辦法再讓我跟他繼續交往下去,因為我的病可能會讓他們的兒子很辛苦,還有經過骨髓移植我會ꐊㄔꔬ那時男友說他想陪我走這一段,我很感動而他也像他所說的盡心盡力的陪伴我,給我勇氣幫我打氣,但我知道他爸媽還是一直再跟他說這件事情,人都是自私的,我不怪他們但我也不想放棄這個讓我有前進動力的依靠,一直到了最近這件事情再度被他爸媽提起,男朋友受不了這樣的壓力,畢竟每天生活在一起,遲早要面對的,他對我說其實他爸給他的期限是到去年底,只是他想能拖就拖,這時候他也沒有說要分手,但我已經知道他的意思,我們沒辦法繼續走下去了一切都結束了,於是我自己說出了分開這件事,他只淡淡的說了對不起,面對他爸的壓力和要顧慮到我似乎已讓他沒辦法承受,
選擇結束我可以理解,我只是覺得生病並不是我願意的,不是我的錯,他爸的態度讓我感覺被嫌棄,如果可以當個正常人誰願意生病,誰願意每次一住院就是一個月都在病房裡,連出院了也因為怕感染哪裡都不能去,我也想像一般的女孩一樣逛街.打扮自己但我現在照鏡子看到的卻是掉光的頭髮,每次出門都是要回醫院,可以當個健康的人誰不想,遺憾的是我就是生病了,我也配合做了任何醫生排給我的療程,為的就是活下去,其實我一直都很樂觀的,但這次真的太難過了,我不怪任何人只是有點感嘆,文章很長
因為我還沒跟家人講這件事,還在做心理準備怕到時候會哭,我不太喜歡把我悲觀的那面讓他們看到,怕他們傷心,謝謝大家耐心的看完,發洩出來感覺好多了,好險有這個版的存在,大家一起加油對抗癌症吧!!!!!
--
Sent from my Windows
--
選擇結束我可以理解,我只是覺得生病並不是我願意的,不是我的錯,他爸的態度讓我感覺被嫌棄,如果可以當個正常人誰願意生病,誰願意每次一住院就是一個月都在病房裡,連出院了也因為怕感染哪裡都不能去,我也想像一般的女孩一樣逛街.打扮自己但我現在照鏡子看到的卻是掉光的頭髮,每次出門都是要回醫院,可以當個健康的人誰不想,遺憾的是我就是生病了,我也配合做了任何醫生排給我的療程,為的就是活下去,其實我一直都很樂觀的,但這次真的太難過了,我不怪任何人只是有點感嘆,文章很長
因為我還沒跟家人講這件事,還在做心理準備怕到時候會哭,我不太喜歡把我悲觀的那面讓他們看到,怕他們傷心,謝謝大家耐心的看完,發洩出來感覺好多了,好險有這個版的存在,大家一起加油對抗癌症吧!!!!!
--
Sent from my Windows
--
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