媽媽是不是有精神相關的疾病? - 躁鬱症

By Elma
at 2012-04-19T00:09
at 2012-04-19T00:09
Table of Contents
我覺得這樣問很不孝,可是我還是覺得媽媽的行為已經快超出我能忍受的範圍了。
我媽媽因為家暴離過婚,有兩個兒子,
離婚之後就沒有聯絡了,
一直到很多很多年後兒子才又找上門來認媽媽。
聽說我外婆是講話很兇的人,也就是會講傷人的話,
所以我媽媽可能是在這樣的環境長大。
然後我是我媽跟我爸的獨生女,
我媽媽也是講話很壞的人,
情緒一來會口不擇言,
發洩對象通常是我,因為我爸常不在家。
我媽心情好的時候人真的很好,
心情不好就甚麼事都會惹他生氣。
我媽一直到我念大學才會叫我的名字,
從小到大都是直接對著家裡喊,不會加上我的名字叫我。
有時候對我爸講到我會說「你女兒」,
或是「因仔」(台語,不知道怎麼打,就小孩的意思)
好像我不是她生的,可是事實上我是我媽媽親生的。
我媽媽有時候情緒很激動會出現一些比較暴力的行為,
像是摔東西、揍我(可是這應該比較像在管小孩吧)
會破口大罵啊之類的。
以上是我小時候媽媽的行為,我覺得還好,
還算是正常吧,可是我媽媽在更年期過後變得更激動了,
會覺得我所做所為都是故意的,
想要氣死她,故意整她。
她會直接編造一個我根本沒做的事情然後認定我就是這個樣子,
就算反駁她也會覺得我在說謊,
像是我因為發作沒去上課,事實上是我整天都在家裡哭,
我媽說其實我一回家就用電腦用到凌晨三四點,
隔天睡到中午,又繼續玩電腦,下午睡過頭就不想去上課。
我跟她說過事實是怎樣,但她完全不相信。
自從我大學過得很不順遂之後我媽媽好像更討厭我了,
手機費用太貴(800...上次被罵是400)會打電話來罵我,
說她很想去死,這樣類似的話已經在一兩年內出現了至少三、四次了,
我小時候她也有說過她想自殺,像氣話,而且次數沒那麼頻繁。
最近一次是說我怎麼不一刀捅死她,
以前罵我的話是比較偏向罵我是廢人之類的,
現在是有點在威脅甚至是覺得我是故意的。
我媽媽罵我的時候眼神會充滿憎恨的看我,
所以我長大後都不敢看她眼睛跟她說話,
只有對家人我會這樣。
我不知道要怎麼辦,我爸說我媽有時候會很鬱卒,
我有憂鬱症,可是我覺得我媽媽不像憂鬱症,也不太像躁鬱症,
不知道是不是真的有生病。
我不可能勸他去看精神科,因為她連我有生病都不相信,
更不可能相信自己有病。
面對這樣子的問題我要怎麼辦?
我已經不住家裡了,可是還是偶爾要回家,
只要回家就算住一晚上而已,
我也很常被罵到哭一晚上。
我媽媽影響我很深,我很怕她,
可是我還是想跟她和平相處,
現在雖然很想常關心我媽或什麼的,
但我都不太敢打電話回家,因為常常打回家又會被罵,
又會影響到我自己的心情。
家人的問題真的無解嗎?
我爸爸沒辦法幫我,因為他對我媽也是用逃避的或是冷處理的方式,
也是我爸爸教我不要聽我媽碎碎念罵人的內容,
可是我做不到,
想請問這樣該怎麼辦呢??
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