不是我不想吃藥 - 精神疾病

By Charlie
at 2010-10-25T11:24
at 2010-10-25T11:24
Table of Contents
板上很多勸吃藥文
問題是 誰可以告訴我 為何我去年九月
一直吃到今年四月 每天按時服藥 完全沒有效果
不要跟我講藥效還沒發揮
醫生也無法確診我的病 如果今天我真是精分或躁鬱
吃藥就能控制 讓我可以做事 可以看書 誰會不想吃藥
我爸還說 他會養我一輩子 這句話是很丟臉
但也意味著 即使我病情很重 得一輩子住院 我也不會有經濟考量
我不是笨蛋 吃藥能好能讓我活下去 我會毫不猶豫的吃
上上星期我去吳台齡那裏看 他說我是解離症 開了安立復跟離憂給我
很奇怪的是 我吃安立復也有半年以上 但去年吃 從頭到尾都無副作用
包括剛吃也一樣 頂多只是跑步會腳麻 尿尿會尿不乾淨 性功能倒還好
但這次吃副作用非常大 吃下去 連走路都會搖 步態不穩 整個人盜汗 昏睡
我是感覺我的身體機能好像老化到七八十歲 原本可以吃得沒副作用的藥
現在副作用超大 之前也吃過首利安 威博雋 利他能等等 太多了
還有我後來去彰化吳潮聰那裏看 那裏的藥就很特別 副作用更小 但不知他開什麼藥
查不太到
我難道真的是笨蛋嗎 自殺很痛苦耶 吃藥能幫助我活下去誰會不想吃
我就說了 就算我一輩子廢掉也無所謂 只要還能看書 運動解解目前巨大無聊痛苦就好
我原本很能看書的 現在都沒了 那種痛苦 真的外人難以了解 不是只有腳的問題而已
連我爸爸這個本身原本堅持吃藥萬歲的人 他也改弦易轍 因為家人在旁邊看最準
有沒有功效 他們最知道 跟我生活的不是網友 是家人
現在 爸爸要我去禮佛 我覺得他的考量是對的
剛走完六公里 沒有媽媽豬的陪伴 特別難過無聊 但原來要走七十五分鐘
今天只花一小時整就走完了 我想到既然我的大腦認知功能有缺失
也許我該換一種生活方式活下去 我可能得對跑步斷念
兩年沒有游泳了 以前覺得游泳是不輸跑步的運動方式 但太懶 沒去試
畢竟我手臂力量衰退不大 也騎騎單車試試 看可不可以騎到新竹
轉念 我的聊天跟聽講的能力卻完全正常 這點倒是值得欣慰
好想找人聊天 每天窩在房間很痛苦 事情不是得等病好才能做
就算病沒好還是值得去試試 不試試會越來越糟 整天封閉自己
我到現在還是對算命師說的深信不疑 他說我今年會遭遇人生最大的死劫
叫天天不應 叫地地不靈 如果能度過 會有三十年的大運
在四十九歲會賺足人生的退休金 五十四歲會想娶第二個老婆
七十九歲會在子孫滿堂的情況下過世 很巧的是 二十天前我的車被偷
我如果車子沒被偷 我幾天前燒炭肯定會必死無疑 我的車很舊
小偷不偷別人新車偷我二十年舊車 很奇怪
我覺得快樂還是要假裝的 每天即使過的再不如意 再痛苦 假裝快樂
也許會感到一絲絲紓解 越愁眉苦臉只會更慘 反正等待病好就是這樣
要有耐心 這也是我最欠缺的
--
問題是 誰可以告訴我 為何我去年九月
一直吃到今年四月 每天按時服藥 完全沒有效果
不要跟我講藥效還沒發揮
醫生也無法確診我的病 如果今天我真是精分或躁鬱
吃藥就能控制 讓我可以做事 可以看書 誰會不想吃藥
我爸還說 他會養我一輩子 這句話是很丟臉
但也意味著 即使我病情很重 得一輩子住院 我也不會有經濟考量
我不是笨蛋 吃藥能好能讓我活下去 我會毫不猶豫的吃
上上星期我去吳台齡那裏看 他說我是解離症 開了安立復跟離憂給我
很奇怪的是 我吃安立復也有半年以上 但去年吃 從頭到尾都無副作用
包括剛吃也一樣 頂多只是跑步會腳麻 尿尿會尿不乾淨 性功能倒還好
但這次吃副作用非常大 吃下去 連走路都會搖 步態不穩 整個人盜汗 昏睡
我是感覺我的身體機能好像老化到七八十歲 原本可以吃得沒副作用的藥
現在副作用超大 之前也吃過首利安 威博雋 利他能等等 太多了
還有我後來去彰化吳潮聰那裏看 那裏的藥就很特別 副作用更小 但不知他開什麼藥
查不太到
我難道真的是笨蛋嗎 自殺很痛苦耶 吃藥能幫助我活下去誰會不想吃
我就說了 就算我一輩子廢掉也無所謂 只要還能看書 運動解解目前巨大無聊痛苦就好
我原本很能看書的 現在都沒了 那種痛苦 真的外人難以了解 不是只有腳的問題而已
連我爸爸這個本身原本堅持吃藥萬歲的人 他也改弦易轍 因為家人在旁邊看最準
有沒有功效 他們最知道 跟我生活的不是網友 是家人
現在 爸爸要我去禮佛 我覺得他的考量是對的
剛走完六公里 沒有媽媽豬的陪伴 特別難過無聊 但原來要走七十五分鐘
今天只花一小時整就走完了 我想到既然我的大腦認知功能有缺失
也許我該換一種生活方式活下去 我可能得對跑步斷念
兩年沒有游泳了 以前覺得游泳是不輸跑步的運動方式 但太懶 沒去試
畢竟我手臂力量衰退不大 也騎騎單車試試 看可不可以騎到新竹
轉念 我的聊天跟聽講的能力卻完全正常 這點倒是值得欣慰
好想找人聊天 每天窩在房間很痛苦 事情不是得等病好才能做
就算病沒好還是值得去試試 不試試會越來越糟 整天封閉自己
我到現在還是對算命師說的深信不疑 他說我今年會遭遇人生最大的死劫
叫天天不應 叫地地不靈 如果能度過 會有三十年的大運
在四十九歲會賺足人生的退休金 五十四歲會想娶第二個老婆
七十九歲會在子孫滿堂的情況下過世 很巧的是 二十天前我的車被偷
我如果車子沒被偷 我幾天前燒炭肯定會必死無疑 我的車很舊
小偷不偷別人新車偷我二十年舊車 很奇怪
我覺得快樂還是要假裝的 每天即使過的再不如意 再痛苦 假裝快樂
也許會感到一絲絲紓解 越愁眉苦臉只會更慘 反正等待病好就是這樣
要有耐心 這也是我最欠缺的
--
Tags:
精神疾病
All Comments

By Yedda
at 2010-10-29T08:04
at 2010-10-29T08:04

By Carolina Franco
at 2010-11-01T06:31
at 2010-11-01T06:31

By Margaret
at 2010-11-02T11:24
at 2010-11-02T11:24
以後都不會有 人的體質會改變 自然副作用也會改變

By Una
at 2010-11-05T03:12
at 2010-11-05T03:12

By Hedy
at 2010-11-08T06:28
at 2010-11-08T06:28

By Liam
at 2010-11-10T12:19
at 2010-11-10T12:19

By Una
at 2010-11-13T14:16
at 2010-11-13T14:16

By Ursula
at 2010-11-15T02:41
at 2010-11-15T02:41

By Eden
at 2010-11-16T19:33
at 2010-11-16T19:33

By John
at 2010-11-20T23:48
at 2010-11-20T23:48

By James
at 2010-11-22T09:34
at 2010-11-22T09:34

By Olga
at 2010-11-26T08:46
at 2010-11-26T08:46

By Callum
at 2010-11-27T14:42
at 2010-11-27T14:42

By Emily
at 2010-11-29T03:21
at 2010-11-29T03:21

By Ingrid
at 2010-12-03T00:32
at 2010-12-03T00:32

By Liam
at 2010-12-03T19:09
at 2010-12-03T19:09

By Mason
at 2010-12-04T19:49
at 2010-12-04T19:49

By Charlie
at 2010-12-07T02:13
at 2010-12-07T02:13

By Frederica
at 2010-12-09T17:45
at 2010-12-09T17:45
也沒用 住院我是不會住的 因為我並不會去街上砍人傷人

By Erin
at 2010-12-11T12:47
at 2010-12-11T12:47

By Skylar DavisLinda
at 2010-12-15T08:21
at 2010-12-15T08:21

By Adele
at 2010-12-16T19:56
at 2010-12-16T19:56

By Robert
at 2010-12-19T15:04
at 2010-12-19T15:04

By Thomas
at 2010-12-21T07:52
at 2010-12-21T07:52

By Candice
at 2010-12-22T02:53
at 2010-12-22T02:53
但自殺和住院 你想選自殺?

By Aaliyah
at 2010-12-22T17:03
at 2010-12-22T17:03

By Mary
at 2010-12-25T21:59
at 2010-12-25T21:59

By Gary
at 2010-12-29T19:13
at 2010-12-29T19:13

By Connor
at 2010-12-30T20:02
at 2010-12-30T20:02

By Ursula
at 2011-01-01T20:07
at 2011-01-01T20:07

By Faithe
at 2011-01-06T08:04
at 2011-01-06T08:04
你怎知道我是護理人員 我其實是臨床心理系畢業生

By Steve
at 2011-01-08T12:38
at 2011-01-08T12:38

By Genevieve
at 2011-01-13T05:55
at 2011-01-13T05:55

By Caroline
at 2011-01-18T00:23
at 2011-01-18T00:23

By Tom
at 2011-01-21T20:13
at 2011-01-21T20:13

By Rachel
at 2011-01-22T19:47
at 2011-01-22T19:47

By Kama
at 2011-01-26T03:32
at 2011-01-26T03:32
我本來根本不相信 但據說我那朋友整個被纏住很不舒服

By Kyle
at 2011-01-27T12:49
at 2011-01-27T12:49

By Tom
at 2011-02-01T04:24
at 2011-02-01T04:24

By George
at 2011-02-03T07:33
at 2011-02-03T07:33
這都是從我朋友那邊聽到 信不信由你了

By George
at 2011-02-03T18:33
at 2011-02-03T18:33

By Oscar
at 2011-02-06T15:10
at 2011-02-06T15:10

By Zanna
at 2011-02-06T20:27
at 2011-02-06T20:27

By Todd Johnson
at 2011-02-08T01:30
at 2011-02-08T01:30
我朋友又不會下咒 = =
或許真有人會下 那你請法師化解吧

By Thomas
at 2011-02-11T14:01
at 2011-02-11T14:01

By Lydia
at 2011-02-13T07:54
at 2011-02-13T07:54

By Skylar DavisLinda
at 2011-02-17T17:26
at 2011-02-17T17:26

By Anonymous
at 2011-02-18T12:29
at 2011-02-18T12:29

By Annie
at 2011-02-23T08:15
at 2011-02-23T08:15

By Ethan
at 2011-02-26T21:25
at 2011-02-26T21:25
這樣似乎也很正常了

By Hedy
at 2011-03-02T04:09
at 2011-03-02T04:09

By Dinah
at 2011-03-03T22:44
at 2011-03-03T22:44
這和學歷高有什麼關係? 不過只是她有心理背景而已阿

By Queena
at 2011-03-04T10:34
at 2011-03-04T10:34

By Olive
at 2011-03-07T06:47
at 2011-03-07T06:47
這和30歲有什麼關係?
30歲代表什麼 講話可以和蔣友柏一樣了?

By Agnes
at 2011-03-07T09:55
at 2011-03-07T09:55

By Sarah
at 2011-03-10T22:05
at 2011-03-10T22:05

By Eartha
at 2011-03-12T02:55
at 2011-03-12T02:55

By Hedwig
at 2011-03-14T03:21
at 2011-03-14T03:21
而且不只99%有效唷!

By Hazel
at 2011-03-17T15:46
at 2011-03-17T15:46

By Donna
at 2011-03-19T15:44
at 2011-03-19T15:44

By Agnes
at 2011-03-22T19:00
at 2011-03-22T19:00

By Valerie
at 2011-03-22T21:27
at 2011-03-22T21:27

By Mason
at 2011-03-24T01:33
at 2011-03-24T01:33

By Valerie
at 2011-03-25T23:05
at 2011-03-25T23:05

By Carol
at 2011-03-27T20:36
at 2011-03-27T20:36

By Emma
at 2011-03-31T17:02
at 2011-03-31T17:02

By John
at 2011-04-01T21:58
at 2011-04-01T21:58

By Candice
at 2011-04-06T11:58
at 2011-04-06T11:58

By Genevieve
at 2011-04-10T22:09
at 2011-04-10T22:09
誰和你迷信科學 科學本身就不是拿來迷信的

By Yuri
at 2011-04-15T03:33
at 2011-04-15T03:33

By Carol
at 2011-04-17T15:58
at 2011-04-17T15:58

By Belly
at 2011-04-19T18:12
at 2011-04-19T18:12

By Charlotte
at 2011-04-24T14:22
at 2011-04-24T14:22

By Elma
at 2011-04-28T08:00
at 2011-04-28T08:00

By Kristin
at 2011-04-28T17:29
at 2011-04-28T17:29

By Rae
at 2011-05-02T09:48
at 2011-05-02T09:48

By Lydia
at 2011-05-03T19:27
at 2011-05-03T19:27

By Margaret
at 2011-05-06T08:17
at 2011-05-06T08:17

By Eden
at 2011-05-06T15:21
at 2011-05-06T15:21

By Andy
at 2011-05-09T14:47
at 2011-05-09T14:47

By Connor
at 2011-05-12T12:45
at 2011-05-12T12:45

By Lydia
at 2011-05-14T19:50
at 2011-05-14T19:50

By Madame
at 2011-05-18T05:32
at 2011-05-18T05:32

By Margaret
at 2011-05-18T07:46
at 2011-05-18T07:46

By Anonymous
at 2011-05-20T06:51
at 2011-05-20T06:51

By Hazel
at 2011-05-21T11:09
at 2011-05-21T11:09

By Oscar
at 2011-05-22T00:47
at 2011-05-22T00:47

By Mary
at 2011-05-26T11:58
at 2011-05-26T11:58

By Daph Bay
at 2011-05-27T06:55
at 2011-05-27T06:55

By Audriana
at 2011-05-31T18:19
at 2011-05-31T18:19
算命阿 等幾十年後再來驗證吧

By Ina
at 2011-06-01T16:02
at 2011-06-01T16:02

By Jake
at 2011-06-02T20:23
at 2011-06-02T20:23

By Ina
at 2011-06-06T15:11
at 2011-06-06T15:11

By Rachel
at 2011-06-07T23:54
at 2011-06-07T23:54

By Lauren
at 2011-06-09T07:04
at 2011-06-09T07:04

By Liam
at 2011-06-10T08:16
at 2011-06-10T08:16
我就遇過幾個 還是靠自己最好

By Lauren
at 2011-06-14T07:48
at 2011-06-14T07:48

By Oliver
at 2011-06-18T03:54
at 2011-06-18T03:54

By Megan
at 2011-06-23T02:59
at 2011-06-23T02:59

By Mia
at 2011-06-27T17:00
at 2011-06-27T17:00

By Anonymous
at 2011-07-02T15:22
at 2011-07-02T15:22

By Robert
at 2011-07-05T17:48
at 2011-07-05T17:48

By Ida
at 2011-07-07T05:47
at 2011-07-07T05:47
對第一線醫療人員來說,有沒有多一個病人住院其實沒差別

By Hardy
at 2011-07-09T16:12
at 2011-07-09T16:12

By Yuri
at 2011-07-12T00:13
at 2011-07-12T00:13

By Barb Cronin
at 2011-07-15T13:38
at 2011-07-15T13:38

By Rachel
at 2011-07-16T04:31
at 2011-07-16T04:31
但是事與願違 恢復的緩慢...

By Thomas
at 2011-07-19T11:26
at 2011-07-19T11:26

By Skylar DavisLinda
at 2011-07-22T21:52
at 2011-07-22T21:52

By Ethan
at 2011-07-26T04:43
at 2011-07-26T04:43

By Odelette
at 2011-07-29T11:21
at 2011-07-29T11:21

By Elma
at 2011-07-30T00:28
at 2011-07-30T00:28
Related Posts
強姦犯的罪刑

By Donna
at 2010-10-24T16:02
at 2010-10-24T16:02
我的非典型強迫思考,大家有看過類似情況嗎

By Susan
at 2010-10-24T14:50
at 2010-10-24T14:50
佛祖的力量能戰勝外道嗎

By Rebecca
at 2010-10-24T13:43
at 2010-10-24T13:43
精神疾病又被污名化

By Victoria
at 2010-10-24T11:07
at 2010-10-24T11:07
請問杏語,何不食肉糜?

By Hedy
at 2010-10-24T10:05
at 2010-10-24T10:05