母後一年 - 抗癌
By Faithe
at 2013-09-01T13:47
at 2013-09-01T13:47
Table of Contents
一年前的這個時候,我默默在這個版淺水,因為我最愛、也最愛我的媽,生病了。
雖然一直知道她會走,但在她的胸口不再起伏的那一刻,還是很難令人接受。
一年了,好或不好,因為情緒都太多太複雜,自己也分不清。
她走後的日子,難以接受的我放下了工作去遙遠的地方玩,想辦法讓心情平復一些。
可是卻似乎不如所想,因為她不在我身邊了,很多事情跟情緒我都失衡了,
逐漸演變為失控...
走了三年的感情也在我的失控下毀了,失去了最愛的媽,失去了最愛的他,我已經不知道
該怎麼辦了。
而明天就是媽媽滿一年的日子,巧的是她的祭日,就是她跟爸結婚紀念日的前一天。
我媽這麼愛他,即使他傷害她到令她生病的程度,仍舊選在結婚紀念日的前一天才肯放手
而我,現在也正淚眼婆娑的等著那段被我親手毀掉的感情,跟那位被我親手傷害的人。
也等著跟媽媽相聚的那一天,告訴自己要堅強、勇敢一點,才能用最好的姿態面對媽媽。
媽媽妳好嗎?好想跟妳說抱歉,我沒有好好照顧自己,但是我會堅強勇敢,連妳的份一起
好好活著...
--
雖然一直知道她會走,但在她的胸口不再起伏的那一刻,還是很難令人接受。
一年了,好或不好,因為情緒都太多太複雜,自己也分不清。
她走後的日子,難以接受的我放下了工作去遙遠的地方玩,想辦法讓心情平復一些。
可是卻似乎不如所想,因為她不在我身邊了,很多事情跟情緒我都失衡了,
逐漸演變為失控...
走了三年的感情也在我的失控下毀了,失去了最愛的媽,失去了最愛的他,我已經不知道
該怎麼辦了。
而明天就是媽媽滿一年的日子,巧的是她的祭日,就是她跟爸結婚紀念日的前一天。
我媽這麼愛他,即使他傷害她到令她生病的程度,仍舊選在結婚紀念日的前一天才肯放手
而我,現在也正淚眼婆娑的等著那段被我親手毀掉的感情,跟那位被我親手傷害的人。
也等著跟媽媽相聚的那一天,告訴自己要堅強、勇敢一點,才能用最好的姿態面對媽媽。
媽媽妳好嗎?好想跟妳說抱歉,我沒有好好照顧自己,但是我會堅強勇敢,連妳的份一起
好好活著...
--
Tags:
抗癌
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